Exhaling

My friend Elizabeth said it well here (not the part about negative comments, though I do get those in my email Inbox at times):

The tasks I face at home while I try to educate the children God has entrusted to me are overwhelming… Anything I do or write online can only come from the bubbling over of a full life here at home; it cannot rob my home. It cannot deplete me the way conversation invariably does. Because I know that it will leave me with nothing left of me to give…

I’d like to believe that in the quiet, I’m more likely to hear God. Because that’s what I really want for my home, for my children, for my life, for my blog–incessant dialogue with God. So I’m trying here to do what seems impossible, stay little and hidden enough to serve Him in a place that is very big and very public. I’m trying to live what I believe and blog what I live.

So (though you have all been very patient with me) please don’t interpret my lack of response as a lack of interest in your comments or a lack of desire to dialogue on these topics. I enjoy this conversation very much, but my priorities have to be people and prayer or this is all just more words in cyberspace. Unnecessary and meaningless. 

My time is not my own, but what little I have to give, I give freely!

 More soon. Meanwhile, let’s continue to pray for one another.

The olive garden is no place for blood
    (nor is solitary prayer to the Father, though
      this may furrow in us the desire)
but in dark hours the Heart is wrung
     so hard
  blood flows with the sweat of struggle
       to surrender
        the very instincts of being
           to the perfect will of I AM.

The body staggers under the weight
      of the will lifted up in sacrifice.

“His heart is ashes, his hope is cheaper than dirt,
and his life is of less worth than clay,
because he failed to know the one who formed him
and inspired him with an active soul
and breathed into him a living spirit.
But he considered our existence an idle game,
and life a festival held for profit…”

            ~Wisdom 15:10-12